Step 1 to Winning Your Boyfriend Back - Break Up Acceptance

Published: 06th June 2009
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Learning how to get back an ex boyfriend can be a long, tricky process. It certainly won't happen right away, and it takes very careful planning to fix your breakup. In the 8-step process to getting your boyfriend back, step 1 involves accepting the fact that your relationship is over.

Ask any man - there are few things worse than breaking up with a girl and having her refuse to accept it. As tough as it is to lose your boyfriend, it's also pretty awkward to be the one who is doing the dumping. If you want to win your man back, you'll need put yourself in his shoes and start thinking like him. Right after he ends your relationship, things can get very awkward for him. It will feel strange to see you, yet he'll also feel bad for hurting you too. The easiest thing for him to do is avoid you at this point, which is why he might seem cold or distant.

Try not to take this personally. It's not that your ex doesn't care about your feelings. Although he did end your relationship, it's a lot easier for him to just completely let go. This includes ending all contact, by phone, email, text, or whatever. This is painful, especially when a very long-term relationship comes to an end. The two of you have been seeing each other practically every day for a long time, and then suddenly: there's nothing but silence. It's not natural, but it's the way it has to be. Silence is a very necessary step in moving you forward, if you want to follow the path to getting back with your ex.

Many women just can't accept the fact that they were dumped. Perhaps they've been on short breaks before, and then gotten back together. These girls may hope this is one of them. Other women believe (wrongly!) that they can remain friends with their ex, and most of them hang around in hopes that they'll one day be wanted back. None of these approaches will work. If your boyfriend dumped you, you simply cannot keep clinging to the relationship. Don't sit there crying and hopeless, sitting next to the phone, waiting for your exboyfriend to call (or worse, looking for an excuse to contact him). Being desperate is a really big turnoff to man, and you're going to destroy any chance you have of getting back together with your boyfriend.

Even if your ex told you those dreaded four words: "Let's just be friends", you cannot cling to that lame ray of hope. It certainly doesn't give you license to hang around, call him, or try to be a part of his life. If you want to one day date your ex again, this type of arrangement will do nothing but make you jealous and angry. As you see his life go on without you, you'll feel pretty terrible. Even worse, you may see him dating other girls. This will create stress way beyond anything you'd experience without him. Understand this: you can't just be friends with your ex. Not when one of you still loves the other.

Be being honest with yourself and letting the relationship go, you're taking the first steps toward making him want you back. Moving on with something new in your life will go a long way toward making your situation a lot more attractive to your ex. Take a trip, pick up an old hobby... whatever you do, let it occupy your time. Every time you think of your ex, try to get him out of your head. And no matter what, don't contact your ex in any way. No calls, emails, text messages - stay completely out of touch. If he's the one who ended it, let it be over. Know in your heart that your relationship is finished. Once he sees that you've accepted your breakup, only then will he consider seeing you again on any kind of romantic terms. Until that happens, your ex is only going to avoid you.

There are 8 individual steps necessary to win back your boyfriend. Accepting your break up is only Step 1. To read the rest of this detailed guide on getting back together, be sure to visit how to Get Back An Ex Boyfriend!

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